On a stormy night listening to Jill Scott’s Collaboration album thinking to myself; when I decided to complete the proper way of loving myself, the decision of someone finding me, to love me simply followed. In the process of that a lot factored in. It all ended up with the simple question; What is The Look of Love?
Situation: Years ago; when I was 15 years old, I entered into a church with my mom whom had just found fresh religion. Little did I know that I would find the meaning of ‘Black Love’. Sitting as a new girl in the church, of course we all know that the looks of others could make and break your level of thoughts to return. On that day as I sat and listened to the choir my hazel eyes began to close and became more and more involved in the beating of the drums. As the music ended, the pastor began to take his place, the musicians stood to take theirs. The grace of which the drummer stood captured my eyes, smoothly brushing off his pants ,with confidence in his walk. Finally , he looked slightly up and we locked eyes. For some reason when he passed me by I could still hear those drums beating, and my heart was following the rhythm of the beat. The cool heat of him made me know that he was the one no matter the circumstances in life. Was that The Look of Love?
Thought: Young love is often misunderstood; or given the magical words, ‘you are too young to know what love is’. I am a firm believer that love can follow you clear across a path of confused bumps and bruises until you give your full attention to whom your true love is, that person who is destined for you. Divorces often begin before marriages. Most who decide to wed bring up the word pre-nup, which means in one person’s mind you will leave them one day. Certainly; years ago man and woman would stay together long periods of time without papers because LOVE at sight mattered and there was an understanding that this was the person for you, which required no witnesses, just the foundation of hearts that drained if they were not near each other. My favorite movie TROY, starring Brad Pitt as the strong and brave warrior , which no woman could tame, met a woman whom he looked upon that made him breakable. The Look of Love from him allowed her to explore herself more than she thought she ever could. The Biblical words ‘when a man finds a woman he finds a good thing’ reign true, and it is evident that we have to go back to those days and ways of thinking.
When eyes meet and hearts become attached with no words; almost as in a silent movie, in our new age time, relationships are so microwavable. The quick move-in and terms of endearment, make us believe we are more than we are to the other, the expectation kicks in quickly. The simple rush of calling someone your woman or man is less than 3 weeks, by that time knowing their medical history or mother’s full name is not a concern. Just knowing his favorite position or kissing her in that spot that makes her eyes and toes move, really makes my generation and the new generation of people believe that it is a relationship or true love.
The Look of Love is more than a lust factor, it is more than the actual physical look of a person. It actually takes you further than that. The Look of Love allows you to explore that person’s foundation of life. A foundation begins with the start of dirt; meaning you would take him or her with all their dirty ways. Things that you find out later will not move you, because all you want is them. Eye contact is the most important factor of The Look of Love because in a person’s eyes lives their truth. The move for that person should never be too quick or slow. The process of wanting more than you can imagine should be in that person’s eyes towards you, and the contact of heat is more than the insertion of body parts. The transformation in both eyes should carry through the years to come. In history you can read that a woman would be taken into a house of the master and her true love was the field worker. The Look of Love allowed the man to still love her beyond the total destruction of her body by a man that uses her for sex. The Look of Love that she would give him upon passing would not allow her to worry about him being the field worker with whips and lashes across his back. They would send their Look of Love through their eyes because words towards each other were forbidden. Once you allow yourself to make the contact and allow yourself to have the feeling of The Look of Love more and more you will understand the beautification of which you are worthy.
Situation: The drummer was my Look of Love and also my heartbreak. We were young then; but I was a believer in knowing that I heard those drums for a reason and our eyes were connected with more than just lustful thoughts. Years later life lead the drummer and I back together after destruction (divorce) and beauty (children) on both sides. The conversations began with shock factors of hearing each other’s voices and foundation chatter kicked in smoothly. Then travels of the first date after so many years, the prepping of me and the constant calls of him making sure I am aware of the lunch date directions. As he greeted me while opening the restaurant door with a smile as I walked up; once we locked eyes again I could hear those faithful drums, and just for a moment as we were sitting at the lunch table, we both were looking at the adults in us. As the waitress asked, “may I take y’all order?” We just sat in the moment of The Look of Love.
Ending: The Look of Love will follow you beyond your valleys of heartache and pain. It will blind the factor of a person’s physical appearance or financial status. The Look of Love is the reflection of the inner you; also allowing you to maybe adjust some parts of you, to understand sometimes change is good. It can be a tricky process but once it is discovered, the definition of the past becomes clear. I am eager everyday to explain to others the new sound in my life; and the glide of my step. My Look of Love is music. What is Your Look of Love?